Do’s And Dont’s Of Adopting In SL

Do's And Dont's of Adopting in sl_001.png

In Yesterdays post I talked about Adopting in SL and why i do it. Today i’m gonna talk about how to start the process of Adopting a child or a child finding a parent in SL. First let’s talk about where to go. There are two places. One being the most popular Heritage adoptions Agency or Next Gen Inc. NGI for short. If you search these two places in SL they should be at the very top of the search page. Once you find the location you want walk in and locate where to find the application of your choosing. This step is very important! Find the application in your Inventory and fill out the application. It will look something like this if you go to Heritage.

Heritage applications

In this step while filling out the application be really specific to what you want in a parent or child. don’t give short answers being more detailed in every question is really the key to finding the right fit for your family. Now you don’t have to write a novel for every question but giving more then one liners or yes no answers really helps.Now read all the NC’s first! In this picture here i have open the parent application.In the parent application it gives specific instructions on what to do.The breakdown in the parent app folder is this. The three ncs you want to read are the following: Panels for 20 days, Panel instructions and the parent application.Once reading all those open up the Parent application and ignore the other two nc’s.

parent app folder breakdown

At the top of the Nc you will see there disclaimer explaining how the Nc works. After reading the disclaimer at the top you can copy that part of it an delete it. Alot of people never do this part and i always find it annoying. because when your a child or parent an your looking at all the different Nc’s that the parent or child makes having to scroll thought this disclaimer every time just to get to the questions can be quite tiring. So when it says you can delete it PLEASE go ahead an delete it! it makes it a lot easier on everyone if you just delete it! and it makes the Nc look nicer as well. See below for disclaimer image.

Parent Instructions

Once you have deleted all that start by filling out the questions on the nc. Remember to put detail in your nc! Two things in the NC that need to be acknowledged is that 1. You must have a home for your child. If you don’t have a home on some land for the kid it probably wont work out. 2. What i always find annoying in Nc’s is where is says put your name on the nc and i see the name but its not the full name of the person.

Example:1. Names of people planning on adopting: Sarah
(List your full name and/or spouse)

Sarah so who’s sarah? I cant just go into search an type her name in and  her profile atomically pulls up right? WRONG! you need to put in your FULL display name and in most cases least on the kids applications this is where it all horribly goes wrong. Let me explain. Lets say i pull up a NC i read it all the way though and i really like the persons card but yet they only give one little name that i cant search to find them and yet i want to contact them to tell them that i’ve liked there panel and i want to talk to them. Well if they just put one name an not there full name then i’m stuck with just liking someone panel without getting to contact them. and with panels they have no way of knowing who actually liked there panel. So in this case its REALLY important to put your full name on the NC its even nicer if you actually drag your calling card onto the nc as well so its easier to find the person! Example of doing it the right way:

  1. Names of people planning on adopting:
    (List your full name and/or spouse)

Sarah Resident ( drag your calling card here!)

Pretty simple right? now i have a way of seeing that the person put their full name onto the nc and with a calling card by the name i can click it with ease and have the person profile pull up right away. So remember don’t just give one name when it says full name put your full name on it so your easier to find.

Once you’ve done that the rest of the nc is really easy to fill out! detail is key!

Ok. so I’ve filled out my NC now what? Now you go find the right panel for you! For parents you’ll go to the parent section on the walls and find an empty panel. For kids you’ll find the kids section. Once you have located your panel you will have to pay a small fee to put it up. For parents its around 200L for kids its only 1L.Waait a second i have to pay for a panel?? why would i do that??  Well first its the rules second if you dont have a panel up and you go around asking the kids / parent if there adopting its kinda rude. consider it like begging. no one likes beggers right? So that is why the panels are there for you. So you wont have to stand there for hours asking every kid or parent if youd like to be adopted or are you adopting? Its really easier to read the panels that have been put up for you and this way your not bombarded by 10 Ims having people bug you about it. it keeps the peace it really does! At heritage they have people monitoring the area incase a greifer or something shows up. if they see you dont have a panel up an your running around begging kids an shouting in local chat ” im a parent let me adopt you!” they will probably ban you from the sim. So again following the rules is good. Also keep in mind that adoption agencies are PG. and in most cases the kids want it to stay that way. So if your running around half naked again the moderators will probably eject you til you get better clothes on.

pretty much its really simple after you pay for your panel you just go around liking the kids / parents panels  and then from there set up a time to meet the child or parent to get to know them. For the parents adopting kids i would suggest doing a month long trial to really get a feel for the person rather then the normal time of a one week trial. because really you cant get a real feel for the person in a week. Also for the Parents id suggest a few simple rules once the trial starts. First let the child know that they are free to set a LM at the home/ land and they are free to invite there friends over. I would suggest NOT allowing the kid to move into a room right away! This is because in the past for me personally I’ve had a kid move into a room set there stuff out an within a day they told m it wasen’t gonna work out and they left without picking there stuff up. So i had to mass return everything. Not only was it upsetting but rather a huge time hassle for me. So this is why i suggest the kid save a LM and let them crash on the furniture that’s placed out around the house rather then them putting out there own stuff. Its a drama life saver this way! Also make sure to tell the child they are free to rezz out there shopping bags but make sure to pick them up after! For those of you that have small prims on there land. Setting these boundaries an other house rules will surly get you off to a great start. Then just bond with the child take them out for ice cream or to a park, communicate with them! Before you know it if you an the child agree  let them know your interested in making the adoption official! Once that happens you’ll have an SL family in no time! Hope this Information helps! Below is a short Do’s and Don’t List:

Do’s

  1. Communicate with them, let them know what you expect out of the trial and vise versa. Make a family meeting so everyone is on board.
  2. Spend time with them, get active take them exploring or plays games or get active in there school
  3. Role-play with them, little things like family meals exc.
  4. Make house rules, set some guild line for them to follow but make it simple like picking up there shopping bags.
  5. Set the trial for a month long

 

Don’t’s

  1. No drama! Talking about anything drama related can make the kid feel unwelcome
  2. Don’t switch out houses every other day. Kids need to feel stable.
  3. Don’t talk about prior trials that failed. Talking about bad experiences can make the child feel scared about finding a family.
  4. Don’t give them linden right away.
  5. Don’t be a child collector. No kid wants 20 siblings to add to there friends list. They could feel lost in the family or forgotten.
  6. No Cruel Punishments. Be reasonable its SL after all.
  7. Don’t let them have a room right away. Incase things don’t work out you wont have to mass return there items.

 

 

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